"I go home. I brush my teeth. Then I go to bed.
Usually in pyjamas. But sometimes in my pants"
Hassel Davidoff
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07.10.07 ISSUE 001
Free this week: to subscribe/unsubscribe
go to http://www.notbitch.com
* Mother-brother connections
* Charts: somebody is number one!
* A horrible story about someone sexually abusing an
animal
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>> Wash me up before you go go! <<
Be careful with that dryer
Which moderately successful singer allegedly
used the toilets of a mid-priced restaurant to
perform a bodily function? Our mole revealed:
"She went into the cubicle alone, locked
the door, and proceeded to defecate or perhaps
urinate. She then washed her hands and just
walked away without a word."
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Who got her big break on American TV when she was
spotted in an audition by a casting director?
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>> Big Questions <<
What people are asking this week.
Which two Mancunian stadium rockers regularly
share a mother?
Which well known actor is renown in some
circles for liking to insert his penis into his
wife during sex?
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Gruesome twosome, Sharon Osbourne and Ozzie Osbourne.
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>> Two sugarz please! <<
Who‘s the daddy?
Which two heriess sisters have had a long-term
relationship with the same man? A man at least
twice their age? They’ve been seen out shopping
and even staying over at the man’s luxury pad at
weekends, sometimes both at the same time. And
their nickname for him? ’Daddy’.
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Which former Big Brother star has been visiting
private schools looking for places for her children?
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>> Corporate Whores <<
Bands up for the highest bidder
Rock'n'roll died a long time ago if rumours coming
out of the music industry are correct. A slew of
top name rock acts can now be bought by anyone
with a field, a mainstage and a fat cheque.
Bob Dylan, Radiohead, Robbie Williams and 50 Cent
have all taken up these lucrative offers to
'headline' at overseas concerts.
-----------------------------------------------------
David Beckham and Paul Merson outside the VIP area of
Arsenal football club "sitting down, drinking beer and
eating goujons".
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>> Things that make you go hmmm <<
Headphone home
The hottest item to have in 2008 is the iPod.
Celebrities all over the world are forking out
over $200 each for the tiny portable music player.
One enterpreneur rap star even bought two! One for
him, one for his wife.
http://www.schmapple.co.uk
**************************************************
Thanks to: chonky, Javier Pérez de Cuéllar, various
record company executives, a bitter journalist or
two, Stephen Hill, David McCandless
***************************************************
Old Jokes Home:
: Knock Knock!
: Who there?
: Doctor.
: Doctor Who?
: Hah you said Doctor Who spacker!
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